“Do not demand reason or meaning with anything you do… know that you are both the slave and master of the heart’s desire. You came to live as though there is no tomorrow.”
The moment you seek meaning in what you do, is the moment you cut yourself off from joy, from the simplicity of living what you love. The thinking mind will ask of you, “but why?” Why take a left when I planned to go right. Why follow the feeling into a new venture when I have found security in the old.
Because you are afraid. Because you are afraid that you will not be loved by them, that they will reject you. You are afraid because you’ve disconnected from you, from the you that is all that is, by putting meaning and end-results and demands to get something in return. You think it’s about others, but the joy is for you, and it’s not about what you get back.
Just do what you desire, and keep doing it. Let it bring you joy.
Bring yourself to a blank canvas and look deeply into it. This is your life. Paint it. Paint because you love it, not because if you do, they’ll pay you for it. Paint it because you’ll feel suffocated if you don’t. Write it with reckless abandon, as if you’re singing to yourself in the shower, or are you afraid that they’ll hear you.
But are you really painting it? Are you really painting it with everything you have within you? Or are you holding back?
Do you know who “they are” anyway? They are just a reflection of you. But we forget. We have seen them as separate. We have seen them with our eyes and forgotten that which only your soul knows, for the soul knows no other. You have seen them with the dollar signs that glitter in your eyes from a lack that cannot be quenched by billions of dollars.
Do not demand, only continue to seek that which you are.